Creativity Resources…

“Creativity is just connecting things. When you ask creative people how they did something, they feel a little guilty because they didn’t really do it, they just saw something. It seemed obvious to them after a while. That’s because they were able to connect experiences they’ve had and synthesize new things.” ~ Steve Jobs

Please take a moment to watch the video below. It will provide you with hope and context for a wonderful new way forward. Be sure to complete your Journal of Grace in the next 7 days. God Bless, Team Grace


Selected Text From Grieve With Grace™…

Following, I have extracted a small portion of Chapter 7 of Grieve With Grace for your benefit. Enjoy!

It’s not that purpose cures grief, it’s that a heightened State of Grace leads to a heightened sense of purpose.

This means that, stone by stone, we must build the archway of Grace over the valley of dread, and feelings of great loss.

We have assembled 3 giant stones in the archway of Grace…

Gratitude requires us to become “glass half full” not “glass half empty” believers. We must become thankful for what we still have and not dwell too long on what we have lost. It is an attitude of Gratitude that sees us through hard times.

Resilience, tenacity, and grit must be our constant companions if we are to move from grief to Grace. If we do not bounce back quickly, we sink further into our own sea of tears. In life, we all get knocked down. How quickly we get back up determines the quality of our life remaining.

Authenticity requires that we look at our lives exactly where we are right now, not through rose-colored glasses to the life we fantasize it to be. It reminds us to look into the mirror, check in with our souls, and decide who we will become as we traverse from grief to Grace. If who you are is not who you aspire to be, grief can give you that big “wake-up call” you need.

Now our discussion turns to the capital C in Grace — Creativity.

As it turns out, this is elemental to moving from grief to Grace.

It is the building block that makes us look at our circumstances differently and choose which crayon in the box we will use to fill in the missing colors in our paint by numbers dreams.

As a husband, father, grandfather, great-grandfather, executive, and author my advice is simply this: Follow your creative passions.

Creativity is defined as the tendency to generate or recognize ideas, alternatives, or possibilities that may be useful in solving problems, communicating with others, and entertaining ourselves and others. Creativity is more about seeing and less about doing.

But to Grieve With Grace, we must do both: See and Do.

As Jan continued her death spiral it became abundantly clear that my life, and the lives of our entire family, would never be the same. We were all facing the no-win scenario—with no hope that our “old” normal would remain normal. And yes, as hard as it may seem, the loss of a loved one requires us to get damn creative, damn fast.

Otherwise, depression sets in and grief wins.

None of us can afford the price we must pay to live in grief forever.

It is natural to know we will mourn and then grieve. It is not natural for us to think about creative ways to shortcut our grief or grieving process.

This is why I am writing this book, especially this chapter on how Creativity heals. It is my creative attempt to help others replace endless grief with Grace and to make sense of my own issues while doing what I do best, find a way up and out of the morass of negative emotions I face—as quickly as possible.

And that pathway to our new normal, indeed, our new life, is dependent on how Creatively we look at the way things are and search for new ways to get our lives back on track and move forward to follow our passions. We must, as Steve Jobs so eloquently pointed out in the quote above, “connect experiences and synthesize new things.”

Because I have written and co-written so many books on this subject, I need to advise you up front that it will seem like I am coaching, mentoring, cajoling, demanding, advising and generally prompting you to respond.

It may seem that I am being pushy, but this is the chapter that requires us all to push the stone uphill if we must. Together. I will be using parts of our best-selling system, Success On Purpose, to help you understand the big issues at play.

Read this chapter on Creativity for the big ideas and take 30 minutes to connect personally with the exercises. If you find you need help in this area, you might consider reviewing Success On Purpose at

I said it before and will say it again now, there is always an easier way to do something if you are willing to seek it out. With almost 100 million data points I can assure you that every word I am about to tell you is not only true, but it is also scientifically proven to be a truth with no exceptions. In short, Creativity is critical to overcoming grief and for us to move toward Grace.

Please permit me to elaborate.

During Jan’s plunge into the darkness of untreatable cancer, I tried to find Creative new ways to express my love for her.

She loved her family, so I maintained a constant flow of communication with all of them.

She loved gardening so I made sure she counted the new blooms on the flowers outside her window.

She loved Christmas so we decorated her room like we would our home back on the pond.

Doing this was beneficial to them and cathartic for me. It was in these daily posts that I became engrossed in the psychology of grief and the grieving process.

Never having experienced a series of life or death decisions before meant that I had to remain open to new ideas while trying to make sense of my current reality. So, in my case, I did what I know to do: take notes, and write! To actually see and record what I saw and what I felt. To look at each day as an opportunity to celebrate Jan’s life, not the steady death march it was becoming.

I could easily write 500 pages on this but Creativity during a crisis is not exactly the same as being Creative inside the tomb of grief with all your hopes and dreams crushed.

My attention became focused on what happens next, not just on getting through the maze unfolding before me.

This is the fight we all must fight. Finding a way to creatively get through to the other side, where grief no longer would remain manifest in our daily lives is our daily challenge. And then purposefully and passionately ascend the wall of grief to a life of Grace up high above the valley of doom and dread.

It may seem a daunting task to creatively address giant words like denial… anger… depression… bargaining… to reach some form of accepting our lot in life.

And yet, Acceptance of your loss is not all you want. Grace is our target.

And in a time of depression and anger, only Creativity can set you free.

Following your creative passion is your truth behind personal freedom.

When I lost Jan, I lost my plan for my life. I lost my drive, my goals, and my vision for what I wanted. I lost a partner who helped me with my work, my home, and every other part of my life. I lost my dinner companion. I lost my lover and my friend.

With her gone, I could not imagine life without her. My plans, my hopes, and dreams—were all just crumpled into wadded-up paper and thrown in the trash. I could not see anything ahead of me that even remotely resembled the life I had. My life wasn’t perfect.

But it was perfectly wonderful with Jan.

After Jan’s death, I believed life would never be as good or as rewarding. And a good life, from now on with the loss I had just experienced, was not even conceivable. Yet, I knew I had to keep carrying on in some fashion.

Survival, without all the benefits of my previous visions of a good life, was not all that desirable, but it was a daily requirement. Just needing to survive had a life-changing impact on me in both small ways and in large purpose/mission focus.

The unfortunate truth is that I slowly moved from a thriving mentality to a survival state of mind.

My old life was over. I accepted that. I also accepted the fact that it was my responsibility to creatively design a new life. If not, I would forever live in the past and never climb out of this deep hole of sadness and regret I was in.

It was exactly like starting all over.

Like editing a movie after the lead actor dies. All of the scenes that included Jan, which were almost all the parts in the movie in my head, were now cut out and somehow, in some way, had to be replaced with something else.

I had to come up with something new or I would be stuck in this grieving mentality of simply settling to get by every day with no hope for anything more. Acceptance and settling were not in my nature. Never has been, never will be.

Yes, I saw that merely accepting my loss did me no good. I had to accept creative control moving from wallowing in self-pity to the vibrancy of life we all pray for. Indeed, the Creativity stone had to be set in place.

I would love to tell you that this is an easy stone to turn. It is not. Gratitude can become a conditioned-response habit.

We naturally become Resilient when we find our true Authenticity. Empathy becomes natural when we open ourselves up to others.

But releasing our natural Creativity requires a completely different mindset.

It is messy. It is personal.

It requires us to not only look but to see.

It requires energy and focus.

Tremendous focus both inward and outward. Again, a form of Synergistic Empathy for yourself and others.

Then, here’s the hard part, it requires us to ACT.




To Grieve With Grace means you will heal With Grace.

By building Resilience with Gratitude and becoming Authentically you. Creatively you. Empathetically you.

If you pursued the articles below you now understand how the experts see Creativity.

You are naturally Creative.

Believe it.

You are smart enough to design life beyond grief. Believe it.

As my story reflects, we always have a choice between remaining in grief or a life of Grace.

No question, we are always at the crossroads of Grief and Grace.

This is the essence of what it means to Grieve With Grace.

We either stay longer in denial, bargaining, anger, depression and merely hope for acceptance…


We increase our State of Grace by becoming more Grateful, Resilient, Authentic, Creative, and Empathetic.

For many, it comes too late when we recognize we had a choice. Choose wisely.

Why Not Build The Bridge of Grace Over The Raging Tears of Grief?

• Do you feel lost in the tears or are you living in Grace?

• How will you escape the natural pull of grief down into the void?

• What life-experience from your past will guide your future?


Grief or Grace is a choice. Choose wisely.


Moving Beyond Acceptance

The Healing Power of Creativity

Below you will find several credible (but easy to read) articles that will cement your understanding of the power of Creativity in your healing from a great loss. Now, we would like to guide your thinking here, giving you some specific ideas for actions you can use immediately. You can answer them personally, or use them as discussion group questions. They have been crafted to condense all the big points into actionable bits of great information! Remember, to build your bridge of Grace you must move beyond merely accepting your loss. You must also accept responsibility for life after grief.

Your Creativity Journal: Accepting Loss…

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Your Creativity Journal: Accepting Responsibility…

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Appendix Listings For The Curious & Committed…

As promised, we have included several valuable resources here to help you move from grief and move your life toward Grace. My goal is to give you the information and tools you need to overcome that “stuck” feeling you might find yourself in. In researching the field of advice to help you move from merely accepting grief vs. accepting your personal responsibility to grow forward, I discovered a wealth of information you might find very comforting or completely useless.

I understand.

My readers may want to understand the scientific aspects of this subject. Some will take my conclusions on the surface, others may want something of a professional bibliography. I decided to take a simple approach and give you a few select articles to help you better understand the practical science behind Grieve With Grace. Many of the articles are very complex and scholarly reviews of each of our 5 keywords.

I selected a few that I thought were easy to read yet give you the full flavor of the topic. If you are a professional Grief Counselor you will already have your own knowledge base, but will find clarity in the references below. If you are a person who is interested in becoming a Grace Counselor, the following will give you a platform for understanding.




Grace Counselor Resources


Article 1: Creativity